My dearest colleagues and friends,
I hope this note finds you all well in mind, body and spirit. I have a few things to share so bear with me.
My long awaited book (Yes I have been working on it for 3 years!) is still in the incubator, and everyone is either trying to push me gently or fiercely hollering at me to get it out. Even my subconscious is in on the campaign. I dreamed a few nights ago that I gave birth; Yes, my book is my baby, not yet ready to meet the world, but I am in labor, working through the last trimester, and it is almost ready-to be my crowning glory!
So, what I am about to say next is my procrastination excuse, and it has been life altering.
I lost four beloved family members over the last few years. One was my ‘little mom’. As I tended and nursed each of my loved ones through their transitions, I remembered my gift of being completely present in communion with those who are leaving this life. I love the process of holding sacred space for loved ones, and supporting them in all ways, physically, emotionally and spiritually.
I also received the painful truth of knowing that when you say goodbye to your mother, you lose the one person on earth who knew you longer than anyone else. A mother holds the space at the other end of life-the process of birthing you. Conception, pregnancy, labor and delivery is a commitment of unconditional love. So you see your mother knew you nine months before you were born even. She fed you, nourishing you, and in a complete act of sacrifice, ushered you into life!
That is one reason you have not heard from me for some time. My heart had a whole lot of mending to do. And, in the healing, we change, we grow, and become someone new. I feel completely new and different today. When I go back in time before all of this loss, peering through the lens of the observer at the person I was before, I see a woman who was less purposeful, less focused on spiritual offerings, and often swinging between ruminating about the past and worrying about the future. I see her as a sapling, thinking time was on her side. Now I know differently.
This is what I know for sure. We only have the moment! Seize it! Live in it. Breathe it in. Play, laugh, and revel in the juicy moments with your loved ones, family and friends and tribe members. Find and give love everywhere you possibly can. Do not take anyone for granted. Don’t take time for granted. Don’t take love for granted.
There is something else I want to share with you. I learned that when I needed most to share my grief, there are so many who did not know how to listen. They used my words as a platform to talk about themselves. You see, your experiences trigger their memory, and then they use your heartfelt words to share their own similar life stories. Don’t do that. I implore you. Listen deeply and actively to everyone you talk with. Listen with your heart. When someone is sharing their deep feelings observe their body language. Do they look sad? Put your arm around them. Do they look angry? Ask them what it feels like. Look deeply into their eyes and see their essence. Share in their grief.
So, from some clumsy friends who were not so skilled at listening, I am now committed to becoming a better listener to you, and to anyone who needs a listener. After participating in my loved ones deaths, I promise to live more in the moment, focus on my gifts, and give those gifts generously and liberally. There is one more thing! I am having a workshop in Salem, Oregon at the Unity Church titled Sacred Healing. I hope to see you there, April 28.
Learn more HERE!